Sunday, April 24, 2011
Some tips to you guys !
I picked it up from some article and wanna share it with u guys. One of the thing that woman need in man, you know what?Read it :D
Most guys don't appreciate being a man.
What do I mean by that? Well, we're attracted to women, but we'd
rather be "picked up" and have the women do all the work.
Wouldn't it be easier if girls approached us, tried to seduce us and take
That's the mindset that many guys (myself included) feel from time to
time and it's a very unattractive mentality to have. Here's why:
"You can either resent being a man or EMBRACE IT"
What is being a man?
- It's being a provider
- It's being strong & dominant
- It's being sexually attracted to females
and most importantly, and the one that I want to talk about today,
- It's being a LEADER
Yes, you can either resent having to make all the decisions in the
relationship OR you can embrace it, see it as a gift and a privilege.
Sometimes being a man sucks, but it's a pretty damn good thing
most of the time.
Think about it, YOU get to make all the decisions, YOU
get to do what you want, YOU LEAD.
1. WHY MOST MEN DON'T DO THIS NATURALLY
When you were little, if you were raised with any siblings, it's
likely that your mother thought you to ask what others want before
"Did I give you permission to do that?!"
"Ask your sister what she wants for dinner"
"Ask your dad what he wants"
Even with our friends, we'd ask among ourselves...
"Ok, what does everyone want to do?"
Our entire childhood was based around asking what everyone
else wanted to do before we did anything else.
You know what? That's a GOOD thing. That's the reason why we
can be friends, because as men, we NEED to listen to other men in
order to co-exist. Otherwise, if all men were leading all the time...
well, we'd have a lot of conflict.
What we NEVER LEARNED (but should have!) is that women
are naturally more submissive and WANT MEN TO LEAD THEM.
This means driving the car, all the time.
This means making the decisions, all the time.
NOTE: THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU NEED TO
BE CORRECT ALL THE TIME.
There are times (many in fact, where you will be wrong about
something, just admit to it. Leading does not mean "doing it your way
all the time", it simply means that you'll
take initiative and always lead
the couple in the direction that you know best
Ultimately, you need to be the man, all the time.
Now you can either think: "Oh wow, that's hard, I don't want to
decide all the time" or like I previously said, you can embrace it and
realize it's one of the biggest gifts you have as a man: "Sweet! I get to
decide what we do.. like all the time?!!? Awesome!"
Now you can be selfish as a leader but I don't recommend it
because it won't work long term. Instead, a good leader will make
sure that he's aware of what everyone wants, needs, desires and
will choose in consequence to make everyone, including himself, happy.
Because I like examples, here's one:
1. If you're walking around on a first date, you might figure out when
the last time she ate, what kind of food she likes, if she has any
allergies, etc. Then, based on this information and your own
personal preference, you'll be well equipped to lead and say:
THE GOOD WAY TO LEAD:
"Oh, I know this great Mexican place around the corner,
let's go have a quick bite"
You now lead the way as a man, and she'll love you for it because
you already found out that she's Ok with Mexican food and that she's a
little hungry herself. Great leaders (and men) always consider what others
want, and then make the best decisions for everyone involved, even
when they are hard decisions to make.
THE NEUTRAL WAY TO LEAD:
"I'm hungry, let's go eat at a restaurant... I don't know which
one, let's just see what happens"
This isn't bad, but this isn't exactly leading with a clear destination
in mind, it's just meandering around like a river without a destination.
THE BAD WAY TO LEAD:
"Let's go have sushi!" (when she hates seafood) and then insist on
going to your choice of restaurant.
THE WORSE WAY TO LEAD:
"So, are you hungry? Do you want to go eat? Ok, Where do you
want to go eat? I'll eat anything, I don't care, where do YOU want to go?"
If you do this, you're acting like a wussy.
Leading applies to so much more than just deciding where to go
or what to do. It means telling a girl what you want truthfully and honestly,
it means escalating, it means taking her hand and leading her somewhere.
If you could do anything and have no chance of failure, what would you do?
As a man, that's your reality.
You'll be proud of yourself as a man, and women will love you for it.
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